That Awkward Transition Stage

 If this was a normal year, I'd be throwing my cleats in my bag and sprinting up the hill to make it to band camp on time. I'd come home absolutely exhausted from all the scrimmages and drills, not to mention the constant urge to hum this years half time show. But that's the thing... this isn't a normal year.

Instead of packing my soccer bag, I'm packing my suitcase. Instead of reading music, I'm reading books on study abroad. I don't have a schedule to compare with anyone, I don't have a pep song to laugh about, and I don't have extremely sore muscles to complain about. I've been at home all week while all my friends have been running around, (literally), getting ready for the school year. It's almost hard to find conversation with even my closest friends. Everything we'd normally talk about this time of year immediately comes back to the fact that I won't be spending this school year with them. I can't have a conversation that doesn't constantly remind me of all the french I need to learn or all the stuff I need to pack.

I love my friends tremendously, but right now we're headed different ways and it's hard. I don't like sitting on the outside, I want to be with them, playing on that field right now, but that's not going to happen. I'm not really here, but I'm not in Morocco yet. I'm in transition. I feel like I'm going to be so relieved once I'm on that plane. My bag will finally be packed and all those heart-wrenching goodbyes will be over. I'm ready to be done with this awkward transition phase, but I'm still not sure if I'm ready to leave...


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